The borderline thinks in black and white terms. You're either good or bad and so are they. I remember when I was in college learning about BPD there was a story on this black and white aspect that always stuck with me. A man diagnosed with BPD (already interesting because BPD is predominately female) learned in the church that should he lust after a woman he should gouge out his eye did just that. He was fearful that he would go to hell and so did exactly as was told by a passage that was not meant to be read in straight black and white. I also remember being terrified because even though I wasn't diagnosed until years later I have a feeling I had BPD and didn't want that to happen to me. I was so afraid of church and religion because of the story of this man. So I did the black and white thing by thinking it would happen to me too.
Black and white thinking can happen in other disorders too, especially anxiety related disorders. However those with BPD have shifting identity which make black and white thinking about personality and not just habits.
The truth is, this is the end of today's writing. I've been battling some inner something for a few days now. I'm not able to get out of bed, take a shower, feed myself or just anything that makes you a human being. I'm in the process of figuring out what's really going on in my head but we know that's difficult because it's hard to connect to my emotions. When I have an update I will definitely let you know!
Love,
Dat Bahamian Borderline
Follow me on Instagram @bahamian_borderline
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